(What to do with this? Maybe I can sell it somewhere. Ahmad needs money! Hahaha!)
Journal—An ongoing dialog between thia/Basilia and Master Yahuwah/Yahushua. …
Friday, July 7, 2017 at 8:31 pm
O my Father—O Father of mine? I don’t know what to do with myself right now. I am aware that I don’t have to do anything sometimes, but! Is just a strange feeling. I don’t feel like writing or sleeping or eating or reading or talking to anybody. I don’t even feel like crying or laughing. Maybe I am just bored with everything! So much You bless me. Where is my gratitude? But I know that You are with me. You know all about these moments I must go through. Maybe I just fall asleep.
Saturday, July 8, 2017 at 3:10 am
I just posted, Where Are Ye All At In This World Of Insanity? Let me now be specific. I was there in 1985:
First Words my Father spoke to me in 1985
O my Master—my Beloved Yahuwah/Yahushua You spoke to my heart on the morning of August 8, 1985. You said to me at that moment:
“I have been shaping you into a vessel, a beautiful vessel to hold flowers, beautiful flowers of love. These flowers are not yours, they belong to Me and I give them to whom I please: you are only holding them as they sit in the water of My love with which I have filled you.
“You cannot give out these flowers on your own, because you are only a vessel holding them; but I will send you those to whom I have given the flowers you are holding; some will pick just the flowers from you, and some will pick you up, and use you to bring good news and cheer to others. Rest in Me and hold My flowers.
“Do not put your own flowers in that vessel of yourself; because they are the flowers that wilt and don’t last; but the flowers that I am letting you hold will last forever.”
And what kind of flowers are those Father? I asked. And You said to me:
“You are only the vessel to hold these flowers and you need not to know what kind of flowers they are, again I say, rest on Father and just know that you are holding MY flowers and not your flowers.”
Then You spoke to me a second Word to answer my dilemma at that time. I asked,
“Father? Are You trying to tell me to quit looking at what I do and what I say and just to rely on You that what I am saying comes from You and what I am is what You are working with and that You are in control and to quit doubting everything because it doesn’t fit exactly with what I think and what I reason to be Okay, Father?
“I am not trying to tell you. I am telling you. I am telling you just that. You look, you wobble, you go back and forth like a seesaw because you are taking your eyes off of ME.
“Even in your typing that is what is happening to you, you take your eyes off the master copy to look at what you are copying. You are being self-conscious.
“Fix your eyes on Me, I am your Master, I am in control, relax, I have taken your yoke and done away with it, now take My yoke, for My yoke is easy.”
Father, help me! I pleaded. And with Your infinite patience You told me,
“I am helping you, I am talking to you plainly, and you know I have touched you and made you whole. Quit trying to perfect My work. Relax and do your work and know that you are doing well.
“Whenever you remember something you have forgotten, realize that I reminded you of it, and that I allow you to forget about certain things for My own reasons, even if you don’t understand My reasons.
“You are not to know everything now because you can’t take it, it will blow your mind.
“Picture yourself as a vessel, but in your human nature you have a narrow mind, the body of your mind is tremendous, but your mind is narrow at the entrance, there is only so much that can go in at one time, that is why I have to pour slowly and gently in order to fill you, and that is why I have to shape you to enlarge your opening so I can fill you.
“Relax about your writing. You will write and you will get published and I will use your writings. That is why I gave you the gift of writing, for you to used it for My esteem and honor. It is not for you to use your gift for your own purposes and gains.
“I’ll do the work, as a matter of fact I have already done it. So don’t worry about anything.
“Take everything in this day and know that My name will be esteemed because you have obeyed and trusted Me and placed Me in the center of your being. Therefore, every little flaw in you has been taken care of. You are a finished work because I am finished—I finished My work when Yahushua suffered for you at the stake!”
Wow! That was some 32 years ago—almost half my life-time. Where am I now in 2017? Another WOW! A Fresh Start with a bang! Even when my saga continues.
Rejoice, O thiaBasilia—O child of My heart, rejoice! This is truly your Fresh Start on to a blissful eternity!
From the previous post…
Me? Dear Reader, from the moment I woke up this morning been doing nothing but, a lot of thinking and reconsidering matters.
The situation between Ahmad and I is constantly in my mind. The more I purpose to ignore Ahmad’s antics, the more Ahmad gives me fuel to explode because of such antics.
No sooner we get on to good graces, we are all peaches and cream for a day or so, then? Ahmad no more. Two, maybe three or more days, ‘where is Ahmad?’
All kinds of possibilities both good and bad running through my mind, until last night. Rather until the moment I came to the closing of Fresh Start.
He came over last night. A pitiful sight! He thinks he got the flu this time. Two days in his room because he does not want to contaminate the baby.
He got no power to even stand up. How he managed to climb 4 floors of stairs? Go figure it! But, he came to talk about money. That’s enough to give him power to raise up from the dead! Hahaha! Anyhow, he no longer gets to me with all his dramatics.
I know him like a book. He is a wonderful man. Other than my beloved Honey of a friend and mentor, the late Norman J. Martinez, and my latest friend the late Adeeb T. Khoury, I have never met anyone to resemble real goodness, but!
Ahmad is also plagued with a brilliant mind that works against his goodness. So, we crash! No kidding.
One explosion after another until this day! Suddenly! As I am in the middle of a sentence, it comes to me, “Call Ahmad and tell him you miss him! You miss your son!”
Sure enough! I obey. I call. The end of the strife between us. How? What happened?
Ahmad answered my call. We talked for a while. The money subject came about. I told him about my concern. He told me not to worry. He would take care of me even if there was no money.
Then! It came to me to read to him the Father’s instructions to me about my attitude towards money.
As I read those words to him, he kept agreeing. Suddenly! I exclaimed, “Ahmad! You are better than me! This is your attitude about money! Absolutely! I never saw it before until this minute!”
O my Father—O Father of mine? How cleverly You have ended the horrible strife between my beloved Ahmad and me!
How can I express the super joy in my heart of this moment? It is not a hype. I am sure.
For every single day, every single moment, You steady my steps. The rain of Your power of love and wisdom from on high drenches my whole being.
• It will never fail us. It will always avail for us.
What a Mighty Yah We Serve! HalleluYah! End of quote.
What is it that you do, Ahmad?
Well, it’s now Saturday, July 8, 2017 at 3:38 a. WOW! Pay you mind to the number 8. Here we are. The 8th day of the 8th month. A DOUBLE EIGHT! The number eight means new beginnings. I sense today to be a new beginning yet for me and for Ahmad.
Now, why did I write that? Is it wishful thinking, O my Father—O Father of mine? O but how I long for it not to be so. How I long to see some tangible results on this day.
YES! RESULTS—Ahmad bought my water filter at last! Better yet, he came for a visit last night to make up for his 3 days absence. He looked pretty good. He kind of broke my boredom of yesterday. I asked, “What is it that you do? One day you are lamenting your 12/16 hours work day. Next day? You are not at work at all? What gives?
“Basilia, my brother! He dropped! Hospital! Quickly! Quickly! But I just got home. Told wife to fix you some eats. Got your water filter. Tomorrow I’ll get the man to install it.”
Hum! Do I believe him? NAY! But! It’s a fresh start for us. Maybe. Maybe I’ll get my filter today. It’ll be so nice to drink filter instead of boiled water. Hahaha! HalleluYah!
So, my dear Reader, that’s where I was and where I am at now. What about you?
His love in my heart for all, thiaBasilia.